Friday, 22 November 2013

Lucky in a Funny Way

It's the worst feeling. Missing someone.
You wonder if they miss you as much as you miss them and you begin to think that you miss them way more and build up a whole elaborate story in your head about how they are carrying on without a thought about you and it just makes you angry and tense. But why do we do it? Why do we presume that they're not missing us?
Because it's likely that they probably are too. They even tell you most days that they miss you and you feel comforted by it, but then your foolish mind takes over again and you convince yourself that you're being forgotten about. Maybe it's insecurity. Maybe it's passion. Or maybe it really is all just in your head and you need to believe them when they say that they really do miss you.
Although on the other hand, missing someone is a lucky thing to experience. It doesn't seem like that when you physically cannot get off the floor, are awake for most of the night or drink a bit too much in order to numb it. But then you get yourself off the floor and get to sleep early and don't need to drink that much and you realise that you are missing somebody for a reason. You are missing somebody because they mean so much to you, are fundamental to your life, they understand you like nobody else and make you feel loved and cherished.
Then you remember that they'll be waiting for you when you get back. You'll get back home and all of your doubts, worries, pain will be seem so far away and you'll laugh at yourself for feeling like that. But when you're not with them and missing them is sometimes so painful, sometimes you try and remember how it felt to be younger. Younger when you couldn't relate to songs like they were written for you, when you had friends that you could spend weeks apart from without missing them because you didn't know what it was to miss someone, before people came crashing into your life like a beautiful force of nature and changed your life in such a great way that it would become impossible not to have them in your life. But then being older beats that because you get to meet people and form wonderful connections with them and then there's the prospect of falling in love too.

So remember that when you're missing somebody, you're lucky. Some people haven't met anybody to miss yet and remember that when you're feeling lost without them, it's the passion in your heart that will keep you going and that you are lucky to have somebody that means so much to you.

It's definitely not an easy thing to remember, but try. Try to remember that and maybe it will get a bit easier.

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